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PROTRACK » GENERAL » Epping Highlights

Epping Highlights

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1 Epping Highlights on Sat Nov 09, 2013 5:35 pm

Mick The Rex

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ProTrack A Grader
ProTrack A Grader
Okay boy & girls with Epping just around the corner, Mick The Rex has decided to look into his crystal ball and list some Epping Highlights or perhaps more appropriately Lowlights.

* captain snooze waking from his slumber, but only once all races run and won, apparently heard there was free froths in clubrooms courtesy of vrta
* 400m novice winner running sub 46sec off 20m, well handled by his coach, guess the cats out off the bag now
* 3200m winner coming from out west, with 600m limit it could be chook watto, but western region runners will have enough in hand to ensure no surprises
* 200m backmarkers winner to run 10m quicker in this race when compared to their heat run, boys its never no penalty

Peeps, these are just a few, feel free to add to the list.

2 Re: Epping Highlights on Sat Nov 09, 2013 6:36 pm

Double Jeopardy


ProTrack A Grader
ProTrack A Grader
Good idea Mick. DJ's looked into his crystal ball and seen the future for the majority of VAL runners next Sunday:

You’re jumping out of your skin, eagerly anticipating the start of the VAL season next Sunday. At this stage, you’ve got delusions of grandeur. A huge winter of smashing the gym (sprinter) / cross country (dizzy) has come and gone and your biggest problem has nothing to do with form. No, all you’re worried about is devising a tactic to avoid a weekly trip to the stewards. At least that’s what you think.

DJ’s got some bad news. Come next Sunday, not long after the starter’s pistol is fired you’ll come to the realisation that you aren’t going as well as you thought. Despite having your “best winter ever,” you get smacked up and run out of your heat. It turns out you’ve been training with JH’s stopwatch all winter.

So while you’re sitting in the stand, contemplating another wasted winter and the wasted summer that awaits (because now you have to spend the next four months chasing ticks around country Victoria in the hope of being competitive by Easter) DJ’s devised a game to help the first VAL meeting of the year go by a little less painfully. See if you can spot them all!


1. Handicap raffle: Quick, grab your program and search through the list to spot the obvious handicap mistake. This one will be even easier this year with the search function on the VAL website down. I hope the handicapper’s spreadsheets are up to date!

2. Late entries: Another easy one. Always a crowd pleaser when the bloke in red is in the middle of the field and the green & white is the backmarker.

3. Enthusiastic youngster: On debut, this kid will have talent to burn and be eager to show everyone what he’s got. An eye catching heat run is assured. Naturally, after a stern talking to from his veteran pro coach, the runner in question will be less enthusiastic when it comes to the final. Double points, if they get called in to the stewards and “inexperience” is used as the excuse.

4. 200m final ‘HARD-FLOAT-HARD’: Those pesky 200s are hard to judge, even harder when you aren’t trying. The stagger adds an unwelcome extra dynamic to pulling up. Just remember backies, those fronties are closer than you think. Look for a few who misjudge the stagger and are forced to work in a ‘float’ at the top of the straight before finishing off for some petrol money.

5. Up and running South Aussie: Traditionally the South Aussies are fitter at this time of year. If any are coming across, you can expect them to be in the finish.

6. Lost time: You can bet most finalists will not improve on their heat runs. Naturally, I'm sure this is purely a fitness issue.

7. Fat to Skinny program: Who still has Stawell grass on their spikes? These people are thinking long term and enough ticks and a few less pies should have them in the finish by Easter. They'll be tailed off at Epping though.

8. Sprinter biting off more than they can chew: This person is a natural sprinter but they’ve gone for a few 20 minute jogs over winter so they feel pretty fit. In a moment of idiocy they enter the 550m. Look for them to ‘pop’ at the bell.

9. 3200m Snorefest: Spot the first person to fall asleep during this distance classic. Time to grab a sandwich and tune in for the last lap when the Hippo crew decides whose turn it is to be the sacrificial lamb.

10. Tardiness: The meeting will run at least 10 minutes late before stitching up unsuspecting finalists and catching up the time late in the program.

C'mon, lets add to the list and generate some forum discussion. I’m sick of reading about Sally Pearson!

3 Re: Epping Highlights on Sat Nov 09, 2013 8:03 pm

Guest

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Guest
11 runs in early 300 big help

12 if all this wasnot true it would be funny glad I did not go to pictures this was funnnier

4 Re: Epping Highlights on Sun Nov 10, 2013 12:35 pm

DizzyRunner


ProTrack Star
ProTrack Star
13. The canteen running out of yellow Gatorades forcing athletes to buy the red stuff

14. The canteen running out of Salad and ham sandwiches, though plenty of 'Salad with margarine' left.

15. 3200 runners wearing spikes for 9min plus only to realise on Monday morning when they cannot walk that this was the first time they've worn spikes since Stawell.

16. Not enough sunscreen, burnt forehead (leading to Warnambool and too much sunscreen, mixed with sweat, and stinging of the eyes)

17. Logging on to ProTrack post-meet and reading another article about the world conspiring against M.Breen (East African athletes rolling in their skinny graves)

5 Re: Epping Highlights on Sun Nov 10, 2013 10:03 pm

Whispers


ProTrack Star
ProTrack Star
18. Rubbing a few sore spots with deep heat or finalgon and then going for a quick visit to the toilet.
What a burning sensation to start the season.

6 Re: Epping Highlights on Mon Nov 11, 2013 9:52 am

ShaneMcK


Moderator
Moderator
Just remember to get your entries in folks! I've been taking a few calls about new athletes, so it's pretty exciting so far. I hope all the athletes rally behind this event and give us a record entry list.

See you all Sunday!

http://www.shanemckenzie.com

7 Re: Epping Highlights on Wed Nov 13, 2013 10:26 am

Bad Boy Bubby


Any chance of an entry list Mac Daddy?

8 Re: Epping Highlights on Wed Nov 13, 2013 10:28 am

ShaneMcK


Moderator
Moderator
Entries now posted

http://www.shanemckenzie.com

9 Re: Epping Highlights on Thu Nov 14, 2013 8:46 pm

Mex

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19. Sprinters waking up on Monday realising that their hammys hurt so much that they can't wipe their own butts let alone get off the seat enough to try Smile

10 Re: Epping Highlights on Fri Nov 15, 2013 11:35 am

vicinsider


20. Runners complaining the reason they didnt run very well was due to the handicaps not being released on PROTRACK the minute after entries closed, it threw their whole preparation off, it was like they had tapered all training around preparing to run 182m instead of 200m!!!

11 Re: Epping Highlights on Fri Nov 15, 2013 12:13 pm

Trackstar

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vicinsider wrote:20. Runners complaining the reason they didnt run very well was due to the handicaps not being released on PROTRACK the minute after entries closed, it threw their whole preparation off, it was like they had tapered all training around preparing to run 182m instead of 200m!!!


21. Some thickhead (eg: vicinsider) turning up to the start demanding he run off scratch because he doesn’t care about handicaps, he’s going to Rio.

12 Re: Epping Highlights on Fri Nov 15, 2013 12:24 pm

Smoke n Mirrorz


ProTrack Star
ProTrack Star
bazzap wrote:11 runs in early 300 big help

12 if all this wasnot true it would be funny glad I did not go to pictures this was funnnier


This does not make sense, NAP issued.

Post, then drink the slab of Melbourne Bitters. Not the other way around

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